Faith, Random


We continue to wait to see what God is going to do with our current home that we have  on the market and the one that we want to buy that we love.  I found out a few weeks ago that the home we are hoping to get, that is in pre-foreclosure, has once again had the hearing and auction rescheduled.  This is the third time!  The foreclosure hearing was supposed to happen mid-July and the auction was scheduled for August 3.  The day before the hearing was supposed to happen, I called the trustees to confirm that the date had not changed.  Oh, but it had.  The hearing is now scheduled for October and the auction for November!

That seems so far away.  But…our house hasn’t sold yet, so really, that is good news for us!

We still don’t know if it is God’s will for our current house to sell, we believe it is and are waiting to see what He is going to do.  And we don’t know, if our house sells, if the one we very much want is to be ours.  We are praying, and we are waiting.  And waiting some more.  And that is okay.  It is actually a blessing. Because it is strengthening our faith and helping us to rely on Him.  What a wonderful, (and yes, often uncomfortable!) placed to be!

There is a song I have come to love that I have begun singing quite frequently through this whole process.  For those of you that are Fireproof fans (AMAZING movie), you will recognize it.   It serves as a reminder for me and applies in a variety of situations.  And as I was just thinking about our hopes and plans for the future and my desire for our house to sell, this song just played on Pandora. As always, I’m thankful to the Lord for the reminder.


When it’s okay to be late…

Oh, the saga continues.  Yes, of course, I’m referring to our quest to sell our home and purchase the older, needs some major work, so-much-we-don’t-know home that we are absolutely in love with.  You can read about how this adventure began here and more here.

I am still working on resting in God’s faithfulness, timing, and provision.  Our house has been listed for over 100 days (wow, it goes against my pride to even want to admit that!) and it is a slooooowww moving process.  Our area is not a hotspot right now in the real estate market, but as I remind myself, it only takes 1 showing if it’s the right buyer.  Given this waiting process, I’m prone to vacillate back and forth between confidence that God has the home we love for us to buy and the “what ifs” if  He doesn’t.  But this is how He has been moving since my last house post.

One Sunday after church, Will told me on the way home that he had really felt God speak to him during the sermon.  I had missed the sermon because I was serving in the nursery that day, so he gave me a quick rundown on how, during the sermon, God led him to the passage in Matthew 13 (verse 44)  about the parable of the hidden treasure.  In this brief parable, a man finds a treasure hidden in a field.  With joy, he hides it again and sells everything he owns to purchase that field.  Now, this parable is an illustration of the kingdom of heaven, which is the treasure we are to seek and give up everything for, but Will felt that God was also using it as a source of encouragement for him.  Timely too, as Will had been fasting the previous week and praying for God to reveal His will in a few different matters, one of those being the house situation.   In addition, this verse was significant to us given that the home we love is really quite literally hidden right now- it is not yet in foreclosure so no appearance on the MLS or foreclosure sites and we found it in its current physically hidden state.

The next day I shared this with my mother, who told me how she had recently been reading a devotion that also had a “treasure” theme.  A day later, a close Christian friend of ours mentioned a verse on Facebook about “treasure”.  The word treasure was being used over and over again.  Will and I decided we would continue to pray that God would guide us and continue to act on faith as we try to sell our home and attain our hidden treasure.  I also thought about the verse that we should build our treasures up in heaven and not on earth (Matthew 6:20), and asked God to help me make sure I don’t replace the treasure of His love and my relationship with Him with the treasure of this house.

As the second scheduled date for the hearing approached, we continued to pray and were relieved that soon after, the auction date would follow and that the home would become bank-owned, not only because that would allow us to begin to get involved in the process (assuming our current home was under contract) but because someone would be taking care of our treasure.  You see, this is a treasure in the rough.  Big time.  Last time I peeked inside the home, I noticed the floors were swelling in the living room– evidence of water damage.   I hear a clock ticking in my head when I think about the need to get someone in there to take care of the poor thing before any more damage is done.  I hate to think about it just sitting there neglected like it is.  So when the date of the hearing had passed, I rejoiced thinking, only a few more weeks until auction time, and this house will get some attention again.

Then, I decided to call the law firm involved in the process to confirm the auction date was still scheduled for June.  Well… it’s not.  Now it is scheduled for August, because the hearing had to be pushed back until July due to someone not having all the paperwork in order.  It was so discouraging to hear this.  While I recognize that it is good for Will and I in the sense that we don’t have a contract yet on our current house, my heart sunk as I thought about two more months passing, a possible increase in water damage, and who knows what else happening…

I shared this new information with Will, who had just arrived home from work, and took our dog outside in the back yard.  As I walked around, I kind of cried out to God in my head (and perhaps with some tears) over the frustrating process.  I asked Him what He was doing in all of this and pleaded with Him yet again to remove the desire for this home if it is not to be ours.  I walked back inside and went over to my computer to check my email (which I do rather compulsively).  I noticed the Proverbs 31 devotion in my inbox that I knew had been there all morning but that I hadn’t bothered to read yet.  As I clicked on it I couldn’t help but stop in my tracks at the title.  “Divine Delays”.  I could have stopped there, because those two words ministered to me in that moment like not much else could, but I did read the whole thing through.  Then I went back and stared at the title some more.  And I knew that God was answering my cries to Him in the backyard.  I knew that He was reminding me, again, that He is in control.  That not only did He know the delay would happen, but that His hand was in it.

And I thanked Him.

And now, we wait.

Faith, Random

The Waiting Game

My mind has been going like crazy the past few days.  This is mostly related to the SheSpeaks contest I entered (see last post if interested).  I wrote my entry before reading all the other entries already posted, which is a Very Good Thing.  If I had read the other posts first, I may not have ended up submitting mine as I think the incredible competition would have succeeded in intimidating me.  Of course, I prefer to think that I would have entered anyway, as I do believe I only did so based on God’s leading.

But still.  Now that the deadline to enter has come and gone, I am now aware that I am up against approximately 186 women.  Yikes!  And many, many of them are not only talented writers, but the message they convey in their entries is heartfelt and memorable.  I am proud of many of them on the one hand, and on the other, my competitive nature comes into play.  I keep re-reading my entry post and compulsively reading those that others wrote, and am fighting that little whisper of “It’s not good enough” that I sometimes hear.  Contests really bring out my insecurities.  I’m working on giving this to God- I know this opportunity is not meant to throw me into internal chaos.  That internal chaos is all my doing, not God’s.

Yet…there is something else this contest is bringing out.  When I first decided to enter, I didn’t care as much if I won.  If I’m being super honest, now I do care.  I really want to win, because the more I think about it, the more I realize what an incredible opportunity it is.  But either way, just entering to win the SheSpeaks conference scholarship has taught me quite a bit about what God may be calling me to do, and what my reaction may be to these plans.  I didn’t quite realize until writing my entry that I was starting to feel a call into women’s ministry (I still am not sure I like “saying” that out loud–it makes it too real).  I thought I would go for the writing track if I won.  But in the process of writing, my desire changed to attend the ministry track.  I know that the change in desire was courtesy of God because it totally surprised the proverbial socks off of me!  So whether I win this contest or not, I have felt excitement bubbling up in me over the past few days that I haven’t felt in awhile.  Excitement over the future, my future.  Excitement about God’s plans for me.  Excitement over opportunities to minister to others and serve the Lord that I never thought I would be open to.

But I am also nervous.  About all those same things that are filling me with excitement.  And I have to wait until next Friday before the three winners are announced.  I. Am. Not. Good. At. Waiting.  Guess I’m a work in progress in that regard as well, because one verse God keeps putting in front of me is to “Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” (Psalm 27:14).  And I’m nervous because whether I win or not, I’ve now put my desire for women’s ministry out there (as well as my hesitant willingness!), and with that comes a form of accountability.  My friends and family will ask me about it, and of course, God isn’t going to stop working on my heart and laying His plans for me just because I may not win a contest.

Hence my mind going like crazy.  This is a lot for me to absorb.  And I know this is a somewhat random post and rather “rambly”.  I’m using this post to process and sort things out.  Sorry ’bout that for those of you still reading!

And may God bless all of you as you learn of plans you didn’t know were in the making!